Finally Seeing the Little Red Flags
While reading a how-to article about developing characters when writing a story, I ran across a Maya Angelou quote that wedged itself in my head.
“I’ve learned,” said Angelou, “that you can tell a lot about a person by the way they handle these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.”
The article suggested paying attention to the short cuts we witness in daily life that reveal something about the person’s character, the little actions that sum up who they are.
For instance, if someone says, “That’s not my problem,” or “That isn’t in my job description,” they’re basically saying they’re not going to do any more than is absolutely necessary. If you need to deal with them, you will have to carefully spell out exactly what they’re to do, leaving no wiggle room whatsoever or they will use it to give less.
Ever see a person walking with deliberate slowness right down the middle of a parking lot, aware traffic is backing up behind them, or leaving their shopping cart in the center of the aisle, forcing other shoppers to either wait or move their cart out of the way? These are the actions of someone who is self-important. Selfish. They’ve just told us more about them than they probably wanted us to know. (Not that they’d care.)
So basically, if I want to find the best shortcuts into showing who a character is and getting my readers to love or despise them, I need to start paying attention to these little character tells people reveal about themselves every day.
I need to learn how to watch for red flags.
Except historically, I’ve been color blind when it comes to seeing red flags. I’ve had people traipse into my life over the years waving flags, banners and parade balloons in the brightest red going, yet I failed to see. It generally wasn’t until much later — post some disastrous encounter — that I could reflect upon and recognize the warning signs I’d been given.
I’ll skip sharing any up-close examples that might cause some who were once in my life, but now are not, to be feeling a bit squirmy about now. Just know that every one of them waved a red flag that I was too blind to see. I’m determined to change that, not only to lessen the number of train wrecks in my future, but also so I can create characters who feel real.
I’ve started recording some of the shortcuts I find that seem to hint at who a person is; their little tells.
For example, I’ve noticed some people have a way with animals that makes me instantly like them; how they get their fingers deep into a dog’s fur and understand all the best places to scratch. I know what kind of person they are in an instant. But if I witness mistreatment — not only of animals, but of people working retail jobs or waiting tables or answering phones, etc. — it colors how I feel about the offender and there’s no walking it back. That’s one of the few red flags I now unfailingly see.
Perhaps I’ve been watching too much YouTube, but it seems more and more people are incapable of doing something good without attaching their name and making certain it gets noticed. If they spot a dog struggling after falling through the ice, they make certain the camera is going before jumping in. If they give the waitress an extra big tip, they don’t miss filming her reaction in the hopes it goes viral. They do good, but only when they’re certain they’re being watched. What does that say about who they are and their true priorities?
I’m noticing if someone is quick to admit they’ve made a mistake or doesn’t know how to do something, that seems to be a good clue to who they are. But if they hear about the good fortune of another and react with anger or extreme envy, it tells something else.
What does it say about a person when they keep looking at their phone whenever you’re talking to them? If every suggestion made is instantly countered with a reason why they can’t? If they make themselves the hero in every story they tell?
And if they can’t handle rainy days, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.
